Anti-Social Ramblings
Apr. 7th, 2008 02:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
soobiebearI feel like talking, but at the same time being anti-social. Things have been just off for me today, was late getting the vertec's up and it just threw off everything for everyone. Still having a lot of problems with REO's sound - RF mostly. Strange it isn't there for the other bands. Can't track it down. Still blaming it on the lighting crew (it's always their fault anyway).
Forgot to turn off a transmitter during check and the end result was two transmitters on the same frequency. Gave everyone quite the headache and I've had my share of stuff thrown at me. Thank you, guys. Never knew you cared so much.
Not enough orange gatorade to go around. I left mine on the line at switch and it was 'accidentally' drank by someone else. Oops. I couldn't take his other one either. :( Had a lemon-lime green one but it irritates my throat.
Speaking of oranges, the orange juice sucks. Some kind of health nut organic no cows involved stuff. I want what I'm used to and what I get at home from the grocery store. The cheap stuff. Without the clumps and chunks in it. The stuff not made from real oranges, 'cos I'm that type of girl.
At least it's Sunday and there was some stir fry kicking about.
Feeling a bit guilty for a number of reasons, not only my own fuck ups today, but some of yesterday's stuff. Won't get into some of it, talked to one of my best mates about it a bit this morning. On top of it, I really don't know what I'm doing here. Learning? Working? Seeing the world and hanging on? I do what I do but I'm no match for half of the guys on this crew. It's way too big a show for me and too quick a jump from the little gigs I'm used to doing into this A1 world. One thing wrong rigging shite and tens of thousands of dollars of equipment comes crashing down. I don't worry about frying a board, I know my way around that, but what the hell do I know about a Strand console? Nothing. The old Hog2 I can fly in an emergency, but not this monsterous beast. The guys have been so sweet tho, probably 'cos they're not used to seeing a female tech. Been hanging around and soaking up all I can (Borga and Jimmy, I owe you two the world). That's another area I feel badly about. I wasn't hired to work with them. Yet I seem to get on better with that half of the crew than the people I'm supposed to work with. Hell, there's a few techs who I've only seen in passing running around or calling something out to me. It's cool, I know they're busy, but just feel I don't know, uncomfortable, that I'm not working more with my own team and have fallen in with the other camps. Not that it's separated at all like that, everyone mingles, but I should (or think I should) be spending more time on my employer's rigs than the event as a whole.
And also a bit guilty I'm not writing back to people as I should. Took me damn near a week (or two?) to get back to Babzz and my brother. Still have a few messages waiting for responses. Don't think I've responded to comments since I left home really. Plenty of time to sit in the back lounge and hang out, but not enough time to call my dad and let him know I'm ok. That's not cool. Need to get my priorities straightened out I guess. I knew a long time ago that this life would kill me, maybe not as swiftly as I'd always thought, but it does strange things to your head. There were some long nights I used to talk to Paul about it all - I miss his company. He was fun but steady as a rock. Someone I could lean on when I wasn't doing so well and didn't have to worry about him getting the wrong idea. Well, it never had romantic overtones on my part, don't know about him. He saw everything unfold and was there when I needed him. A tour buddy, I guess is what he was. A friend. Life Mentor. The guys here are nice enough, but crazy. Don't have that connection with any of them.
And there's another bit of guilt. They're starting their tour next week and I'm not there. Dammit, I should be there, even if Pete's not. I've been through the logical reasons why I should be here instead of there, but my loyalty is screaming at me that I need to be with them, on their crappy little bus from 1985 with the mirrors on the back sides of the cushions and the windows that don't work, not on this slicked out high budget affair.
The tv is on - great little program running, a repeat but a goodie. Searching for satellite signal. One of my favourites. Luckily, it's on a lot so I get to catch up on it.
Oh, and one pic as Photobucket has decided to take a few of my ups again. I spend a fair amount of time here lately and it's cool.
*edit* Sorry, forgot to cut the size of that pic down. All fixed now I hope.
Forgot to turn off a transmitter during check and the end result was two transmitters on the same frequency. Gave everyone quite the headache and I've had my share of stuff thrown at me. Thank you, guys. Never knew you cared so much.
Not enough orange gatorade to go around. I left mine on the line at switch and it was 'accidentally' drank by someone else. Oops. I couldn't take his other one either. :( Had a lemon-lime green one but it irritates my throat.
Speaking of oranges, the orange juice sucks. Some kind of health nut organic no cows involved stuff. I want what I'm used to and what I get at home from the grocery store. The cheap stuff. Without the clumps and chunks in it. The stuff not made from real oranges, 'cos I'm that type of girl.
At least it's Sunday and there was some stir fry kicking about.
Feeling a bit guilty for a number of reasons, not only my own fuck ups today, but some of yesterday's stuff. Won't get into some of it, talked to one of my best mates about it a bit this morning. On top of it, I really don't know what I'm doing here. Learning? Working? Seeing the world and hanging on? I do what I do but I'm no match for half of the guys on this crew. It's way too big a show for me and too quick a jump from the little gigs I'm used to doing into this A1 world. One thing wrong rigging shite and tens of thousands of dollars of equipment comes crashing down. I don't worry about frying a board, I know my way around that, but what the hell do I know about a Strand console? Nothing. The old Hog2 I can fly in an emergency, but not this monsterous beast. The guys have been so sweet tho, probably 'cos they're not used to seeing a female tech. Been hanging around and soaking up all I can (Borga and Jimmy, I owe you two the world). That's another area I feel badly about. I wasn't hired to work with them. Yet I seem to get on better with that half of the crew than the people I'm supposed to work with. Hell, there's a few techs who I've only seen in passing running around or calling something out to me. It's cool, I know they're busy, but just feel I don't know, uncomfortable, that I'm not working more with my own team and have fallen in with the other camps. Not that it's separated at all like that, everyone mingles, but I should (or think I should) be spending more time on my employer's rigs than the event as a whole.
And also a bit guilty I'm not writing back to people as I should. Took me damn near a week (or two?) to get back to Babzz and my brother. Still have a few messages waiting for responses. Don't think I've responded to comments since I left home really. Plenty of time to sit in the back lounge and hang out, but not enough time to call my dad and let him know I'm ok. That's not cool. Need to get my priorities straightened out I guess. I knew a long time ago that this life would kill me, maybe not as swiftly as I'd always thought, but it does strange things to your head. There were some long nights I used to talk to Paul about it all - I miss his company. He was fun but steady as a rock. Someone I could lean on when I wasn't doing so well and didn't have to worry about him getting the wrong idea. Well, it never had romantic overtones on my part, don't know about him. He saw everything unfold and was there when I needed him. A tour buddy, I guess is what he was. A friend. Life Mentor. The guys here are nice enough, but crazy. Don't have that connection with any of them.
And there's another bit of guilt. They're starting their tour next week and I'm not there. Dammit, I should be there, even if Pete's not. I've been through the logical reasons why I should be here instead of there, but my loyalty is screaming at me that I need to be with them, on their crappy little bus from 1985 with the mirrors on the back sides of the cushions and the windows that don't work, not on this slicked out high budget affair.
The tv is on - great little program running, a repeat but a goodie. Searching for satellite signal. One of my favourites. Luckily, it's on a lot so I get to catch up on it.
Oh, and one pic as Photobucket has decided to take a few of my ups again. I spend a fair amount of time here lately and it's cool.
*edit* Sorry, forgot to cut the size of that pic down. All fixed now I hope.
